Will Quaid’s name really travel to Mars? Or is it all just a dream? (Spoiler Alert: It’s not a dream)
You can go to Mars too (h/t The Daily What)
A related Time-Waster with a SFW version of the titular* chick? Sure.
Hey guys, sorry we didn’t really post any new content this week, we were too busy 1) writing short stories we don’t intend for anyone to read, 2) pouring our hearts out to our friend about our girl troubles, 3) playing guitar, 4) being glad we aren’t in Boston, 5) institutional investing. Respectively.
But hey, I’ve got nothing to do Sunday. If the weather is bad, and I feel creative, maybe I’ll write something for you. Until then, get out there and make it a great weekend.
Additional Time Waster Here.
To male porn stars grunting, moaning and, especially, speaking. Shut the F up. Please.
This may come as a shock to you, your goatee, and your shorn scrotum, but no one is picking up a copy of “Schindler’s Fist” to hear your masterful line delivery of classic dialogue such as “Oh yeah” and “You like that?” I don’t know about those blonde twins, sir, but I do not. Like it. When you speak. Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy the things you are doing, but, much like a barber, shoeshiner or masseuse, I just don’t want you to speak while you are doing them. This is my time, not yours.
To Mongolian Beef.
Or chicken. Or Mongolian ANYTHING. Fry some onions and garlic, add some unrecognizable meat product and then drown it in chili peppers and chili sauce. That is a meal fit for conquerors and the holders of territories that are strategically unimportant in RISK. If science ever created a Mongolian burrito, science could retire to Aruba because I would buy one of those for every breakfast, lunch and dinner. Mongolian food is the best.
I know people will complain that I’m describing a Panda-Expressed bastardization of Chinese food rather than traditional (bland and non-spicy) Mongolian cuisine like Boodog, which, if wikipedia memory serves me correctly, is mutton cooked within the abdominal cavity of a deboned marmot. To those people I say: I cannot hear your complaint regarding my historical inaccuracies due to the loud, tumescence-inhibiting chatter of the dude in this porno I’m watching.
Bonus neat fact about Mongolia: Apparently real live Tremors live in their deserts, Maybe (More here)
(212): So I just woke up to find my roomates shouting at canisters of pink goo and now their playing music to make it dance
(917): Your roomates are the best
(212): Remember that chick Dana I’ve been macking on? I went to her house last night and she got freaky. kept calling me the “Keymaster” and basically tried to rape me.
(212): I make it a rule never to get involved with possessed people
(917): Dude, the museum is covered in goo and everyone is singing and the statue of liberty is walking down the street
(1-917): I love New York
(646): We just crossed streams and it was bad news
(212): It usually is
Read More »
Hey did I mention how I liked the new Star Trek movie? I did? Repeatedly? Oh. Well, I also really like the shows, especially ‘Star Trek: The Next Generation.’ You know what else I like? Drinking alcohol.
So I was pleased to find this, the Star Trek: TNG Drinking Game.
Welcome to Uninformed Review
A weekly feature where I review a movie, book, or television program that I have not seen and know little about, save for what I can deduce from the title and personnel.
“The English Patient” starring Ralph Fiennes and Juliette Binoche
This is an action packed World War Two adventure with some of the best special effects I have seen since Jurassic Park. I LOVED IT. Its been out for a few years, so I’ll assmue you’re familiar but if you haven’t seen it yet…
Read More »